Been thinking a lot lately about the people I choose to surround myself with in my life.
I was told yesterday, “You’re a good soul who gets involved with a few complicated relationships.” And as much as I know that that’s true, I’m not sure what I need the reaction to be. Did I sense pity in the person speaking to me?
If so, I’m not sure that I wanted it. Some of the relationships I’ve entered into (sometimes by choice, and sometimes not) are particularly draining. There are people whom I interact with on an almost daily basis who are just bad bad bad for me – their actions make me angry, unsteady, unsure. I become more vitriolic than the 2012 Presidential campaign.
I would love nothing more than to say in my head, “Fuck off.” and have that be the end of whatever story is running around like a hamster on a wheel in my brain. I would love nothing more than to feel secure in the knowledge that no one can make me feel inferior without my consent.
Something only gets powerful if one gives it power…